Taking A Chance

Now this blog is supposed to be about my Trakehners and pursuing my goals with them.
I love the breed but more importantly I love horses.
I check out an auction site every week that lists horses available for purchase. I usually look at the pretty ones and hope that they find good home but then I one caught my eye. She was listed as a 4 yr old appaloosa looking thing. I had to have her. The pictures didn't show much but there was just something about her that made me go crazy and buy her.
So I bought her via the phone and then picked her up three days later and brought her to quarantine. Yes she was skinny and she had lumps all over her. She turned out to be a very dirty tovero grey and white paint/pinto. Ok, I thought to myself no big deal she's not as trained as I thought but you know what she has a lot of personality and seems like she just wants somewhere to feel safe. So going against all reason I continued to pour money into her.
My vet came on Monday (this past Monday) and took blood for some bloodwork. He also looked at her teeth and said she is somewhere between 8-11 years old. In addition to that he said she was probably a nurse mare. I won't go into detail about what a nurse mare is but know that it leaves a lot of foals orphaned in favor of more expensive foals. Then he saw her lumps and bumps and said that they are probably tumors. The bloodwork came back and one of the markers for lactate was out of normal range. Which means more tests.
Sometimes taking a chance yields good results. Like the job I took and deciding to live where I live. Sometimes taking a chance yields unfavorable results- when I was in middle school a stray cat came  to my house and wouldn't leave. So after three days my parents said we could keep the cat. They took her to the vet, spent money on her and then two days afterwards she died on our kitchen floor. Her name was Diamond and she was a very sweet cat. My step-dad was annoyed that she croaked so soon after we put a lot of money into her but then he said something like "Well, maybe she needed a place to feel safe; a place where humans looked after her so that she could die in comfort."

Lexy is a sweet mare. She seems like she's had a rough go of life and she's young. She has so much ahead of her and yet maybe not much longer. Everyone loves her as soon as they meet her. She is a gentle soul. So maybe she doesn't have much time left on earth. Maybe I am her hospice care. Maybe I felt the urge to help her because no one else would.
I write this not because I want advice on what to do but because I want to share her story. I want to let you know that sometimes a creature just needs to know that there is good in the world. That they have a place where they can convalesce in peace and then leave this world knowing that they were loved. Even if it was for only a short time.

On the plus side.
She has gained weight in the week I've owned her. She seems like she loves everything about life now and if she only has a short time left here I'm going to do my best to help her live each day to its fullest and do whatever I can to help her heal. Who knows. Maybe a miracle will happen. Maybe she doesn't have cancer and maybe I'm worried for no reason but I have to prepare and accept that maybe I'm pouring a lot of money into a creature that is "a pit" so to speak. I should be worried and stressed because I do have two horses who need their bills paid but I know that I rescued Lexy for a reason and that the money for her care will come to me when I need it. I just have to have faith and trust that I am doing the right thing.

Here are some pictures

 These photos of her eating the grass are a week after I bought her and regular meals and two baths....

 Staying clean isn't her style

 These photos in the stall are from the second day she was in CT

 The pictures below are the day I got her from auction. She walked right on the trailer.

The next step in my career

So here's a question:
What does one do when your job is going well; everyone loves you and you enjoy what your doing but you aren't getting the training you want and then you find a job that sounds fantastic- a good stepping stone into the horse industry- the question do I stay or do I go?
It's not that it's a dead end here, where I'm at but I feel like I'm not growing as a rider and that I'm sacrificing my dreams (of competing etc) to be the coach and the trainer.
That saying "those who can't do teach" burns my ears and I want to do; I just never had the opportunity to do. I want to show and I want to be a top rider; but where I'm at right now that won't happen.

I have my horse (soon to be 2) and I have to think about and can I afford to move down to VA with two horses? One that is semi-retired and the other that won't be doing anything for several years...
On the plus side the farm is an active breeding facility and they do eventers and dressage and it sounds glorious.

I am a loyal person so I will not leave my job for now but I hope that when it is time for me to leave that that position down in VA is open and that I'd be able to work there.

I've always been career minded; I guess I need to weigh the options.

The Duchess is feeling better

First and foremost:
I was an idiot to breed Julie. I should have realized it was going to be way above my salary level. I think with my heart too much.

Side note:
I put Fae on allbreedpedigree which means she has to be born and live. We're worried about Fae being in distress/ the possibility of Julie aborting and I'm really really hoping we have a normal foaling in July and that all of my stress and worry is for nothing.
Julie is doing better. She's eating all of her grain but not much of her hay, luckily I have her on Hay stretcher and on Dengie so she is getting fiber. She's still picky about her food and I have to put a ton of corn oil on it for her to even think about eating her grain. I never thought a mare would be this ridiculous while being pregnant. I guess it comes with being the Duchess of the world and having me as her slave. Yes, I know where I stand in the world. I'm the one who makes sure her every whim is taken care of. I'm her herd and I guess that means she acts more human like than I'd like to admit.

She's doing better, that's the important thing. Now I just have to figure out how I'm going to afford this next vet visit and my rent and my loan bills and maybe even food for me...

My needs are last on the list. Hers are first.

I refer to Julie as the duchess because she is very poised as a horse and holds herself above everyone else. She isn't merely a princess or a queen but a stately mare who quietly rules the barn while she lets other horses think they have the power; but they don't.

Farm Name Ideas

So in my quest to achieve my dreams I need to come up with a farm name.
Julie is doing much better; I've spent way too much money that I really don't have, on her but she's doing better and she's happier. So I'm just waiting on the blood work to make sure she is still pregnant and that everything is normal. I still have more stuff I need to buy like shots for her and supplements to keep her well and healthy.

Random rants I know.

Anyways names for my future farm:

Dream-it Trakehners

Jeweled Trakehners

Fountain Farms

Serendipity Stables

Trakehners of Fate

And there's more I guess.

If you want a generator for farm names: name generator

2012 woes

Being a horse owner is never easy, neither is having to make the decisions that come with it. Julie has had a rough month. It's been one thing after another since Dec. 11th and we're both exhausted and tired.
She had a fever and lymphangitis, She is anemic and won't eat. She keeps rocking all of her weight on her front end and I'm worried she's developed laminitis. I'm waiting for her to colic. She might have ulcers.
She's lost so much weight and I don't know if the foal is ok or not.

She needs so much attention and care and I cannot give it to her physically, mentally, emotionally or financially. I'm beyond stupid. I don't think she's going to get better. She's losing that will to live and I'm losing hope. She doesn't like sharing me and I'm just tired of dealing with her. I'm tired of everything. 2013 is going to be full of tears just like 2012 was.

I think 2013 might see me walk away from horses permanently.

November Nuances

So, it's been a while since I posted on here. It seems like everything is flying by and this year is taking me on a far, far away ride.

Julie is doing pretty well, she's gotten fat. Not baby fat but fat, fat so she's had her food cut back. Also she still isn't moving very soundly and I think we need a new farrier. A part of me just wants to sell Julie and buy a gelding that is in shape and ready to compete. The cost of having two horses is really getting to me.

What did I get myself into.

Even though I think I should sell Julie I am still looking at buying more horses and dreaming of my breeding/training farm.

Here is the stallion I want to buy:
Admired by All

I could register him as a Trakehner and as an American Warmblood (with the American Warmblood Registry)

The other mare I want for my breeding farm right now is this beauty:
Xena

Which means I really need to get a truck and trailer and my own property.

Oh yea, there's that whole money thing again.

My goal is to have a horse farm where I breed Trakehners and American Warmbloods for eventing and as solid all around mounts.

There's that saying...

If wishes were horses, dreamers would ride. I'm definitely a dreamer and now I just need to find the right path to ride my horses down.

If only my brain would get to work and start creating more stories so that I can eventually make enough money to buy a horse farm
Like this one

I don't need a house I just need a nice barn with land.

45 Day Check

So I haven't been very good about posting on this blog but I have been a little busy... what with working full time and stressing out about whether or not Julie is still pregnant but my worries are unfounded. This makes me wonder what I'll be like if I'm ever pregnant. A post for a different blog at a different time.
Here is a video of Fae's 45 day check and guess what you can totally see Fae's head

Here is another. Fae is getting so big!